Some motivation for the lazy!

Being a creature blessed with extraordinary laziness and one having an ability to be indifferent to it is awesome. There's a plethora of things that you can do. You can sit at one place and enjoy watching -the walls, the spiders if any, the spider's dilemma to choose between the delicious house fly and the good-looking mosquito, those soft, semi-transparent lizards setting world records for tongue speed(beating all the frogs on earth :P). You can think about your neighboring country’s nuclear weapon arsenal and world peace at the same time, you can watch cookery shows on television, you can feel like a retired man chilling out with ice-cream bowls everyday and what not? Yes, there’s a strange fun in being at one place! You can feel like the Buddha- stable and focused! Don’t you think it takes some focus to observe organisms like that? :P
If you find these things a bit non-involving for the body, I can also suggest you some tangible stuff. When you are at one place, you can learn the art of building belly-fat! Feel blessed to be not moving. Assume danger in any motion. Just sit there. Lie there! Just keep working your fingers around your waist and feel the fluffy, spongy stuff! Why does everyone always think of muscles? After all, fat is also a ‘biological’ element. We respect anything related with that adjective, don't we! Who knows; some day being fat may become fashionable! You will need the experience then!
People say that one should look for opportunities every time. So, I took this opportunity to guide all of you there to just looooooooove your laziness! To not feel guilty about the ‘sit-and-do-nothing’ phases in life! I do have more ideas but I can’t share all of them together. Sparing some of them for laziness’ sake!

I love this virtual world...that's it...

TISS trip Part 2

THE PEOPLE

I have the memories of every journey etched into my brain and heart. The reason is simple- I have had very few journeys in life! No one lets me out of the house to spend money to watch the world!
I remember a journey for the people I meet and the pictures I take. Though I didn’t get much of a chance to name a picture folder of the same name as this write up is, I met some really good people. The list begins with-

Some IIM-A pass-out

The species are so sparse that I feel like finding God when I come across one! The credit of making them Gods also goes to the management entrance coaching centers like the one I had joined! I directly know only two people who have made it to any of the ‘centers of excellence’! :P
The ‘Devi’ -as I should call her after knowing the tag she carries-had come to get her sister’s documents verified. She justified a Prateek sir statement that an IIM-A student will never look or behave like one. A very nice and subtle person; she gave me company at the reception lounge for a good twenty minutes, in which she educated me about the falling returns on investment at the IIM’s and fantastic levels of the same at TISS. Like my mother loves it when someone praises her household appliances or furniture or the God’s corner or her Saree or the design of her home or her children or her cooked meals-it’d be better if I stop here-her statement about TISS made me happy. :P
I repeated an idiotic mistake that I’ve been committing way too often now. After talking to her for so long and about so many things, I forgot to ask her name!
So, I’ll remember her as ‘some IIM-A pass out’. . .

Akshay

I love to change my accent with people. And I love speaking Hindi in the North Indian accent. A bit of Haryanvi touch, some intentional rudeness and lots of fun; I enjoy that. Akshay was the perfect ‘banda’ for a team. All the fears of having boring room partners were gone! He told me about the time he had spent in the IMA and the sad end of it. During that discussion, I mentioned that I had gained 11 kilograms in the past 11 months. This has been the only achievement in the past one year for me. In the last three years, this is the first person who has come close to me in terms of weight fluctuation. My earlier record is losing 6 kilograms in 20 days (Courtesy- a twenty-day training in Mumbai!). He said that he had lost 10 kilograms in 2 months. No wonder our jawaans commit suicides!
We cracked jokes, discovered the mutual love for food, made fun of a lot of people and had to get into some serious, ‘unavoidable’ appreciation of femininity. We finally celebrated the event of getting a flat by singing ‘Pardesi’, the Dev D song, in an auto, loudly! The pick of the meeting was when I lent him my belt when he was clumsily moving around for the process! Akshay, you should thank my extra pounds, buddy, that have rendered the belts obsolete for me now!

Aashima

She told me that she would call me when she reaches the campus. Somehow, she didn’t. When she came and sat one chair away from me and asked for my bank challan to copy some trivial details of the fees, I came to know that she is the one whose call I had been expecting since morning. As far as the popular wisdom about Delhi university crowd goes, I was expecting her to be speaking in a pretending accent and someone like they say in incorrect English as ‘proudy’! Ha-ha! But she turned out to be a very sweet girl who seemed to quite sane as well. Actually, after some time with her, she seemed like a potential ‘she-will-write-your-assignment-for-you’ girl.
I hope you don’t change your mind after reading this, Aashima!


Aashima’s dad

In life, you meet some people who shape the way you think or act. I don’t know if it is premature to say that uncle has joined my list, I certainly feel so. I loved the very first gesture he offered. At lunch time, we headed towards the dining hall to pacify all the relevant organisms in our tummies. When we took out our wallets to buy the coupons, he stopped us and ‘sponsored’ the lunch. I love people who offer food for free!
Well, the reason for his influence over me wasn’t this gesture though. It was the one that followed. After everyone had analyzed the food, its quantity and quality, some conversations began.
His first question was to all of us. He asked us our respective reasons for joining TISS. The ghosts of interview nightmares were back! I stayed silent. After facing it a zillion times in the past one year, I have almost ‘fallen in hatred’ with the word ‘why’!
Before uncle began his story, a couple of guys mentioned their reasons which sounded like crammed answers. I guess the discussion lasted for around forty minutes, which passed away like forty seconds because of the depth and seriousness of the things he was talking about.
He bestowed over us all the ‘gyaan’ about how national highways were not suitable for Indian rural demographic, the neglect of environment in most of the government projects, the great grand implementation problem with Indian schemes, two failed projects in UP- one power plant worth 19 crores supposed to run on garbage (that lasted only two days!) and a national highway that is worth 9.5 crores which is a testimony of mindless plan-making of the engineers working on the project. The road was supposed to have different divisions for pedestrians and cyclists and vehicles. It finally had them but the sad part is that the cyclists and pedestrians are allotted the upward slope of the road which renders it impossible for them to use it, resulting in the ‘Indian khichdi’ on roads there! Out of his dissatisfaction with them he declared the engineers from IIT’s and the managers from IIM’s (I don’t know if the IIM guys join governmental organizations :P) as the most unintelligent people in the country! The only way to bring about a change in the system is by being a part of it, he said.
I loved it when he said that he demanded for registering an FIR against a minister (I don’t remember the name)-who had continuously neglected the environment in all the new projects his government undertook- in a meeting also attended by Ms. Sheila Dikshit and a few other leaders. No one present there in the hall could take any action against him after he justified his statements. I wish I was this brave.
All in all, it was a fantastic feeling after I met him. He was one of the kinds of people I desire to spend time with. His words, “Tata institute of social sciences will be spending so much money on you. You need to be clear about what you want to do for the society and for the people” kept buzzing my head all through the journey back home. I wonder why Aashima didn’t believe me when I said that her dad was rocking! I hope you do believe me now, Aashima… :)


Ms. Kanchan Kamle

Amazingly polite, at least through the entire first interaction, Ms. Kamle seemed to be a completely no-issues lady. She is the owner of the flat that we have booked for resting our bums when we will be released off our leash by our college. After she showed us the flat, she served us ‘kokam ka sharbat’ which was tastier than it looked from outside the glass. The slight sour taste gave it my extra point over all the regular sweet sharbats.
When we showed interest in the flat, she asked us to follow a few ‘simple’ conditions which were mandatory to get it. They were-
1. Thou shalt not bring in girls here for an overnight stay.
2. Thou shalt not drink or smoke.
3. Thou shalt maintain dignity in the society
4. Thou shalt pay the deposits in advance.
I loved the innocence with which she said all that.Actually, she was bothered because of her earlier experience with the girls who stayed there last year. She told us about their ‘modern and sophisticated’ lifestyle and we assured her of a ‘rural lifestyle’ that we aren’t going to follow!
See you, aunty!

BTW’s

There were a few other people whom I met that day. A guy from Manipur who promised that he’d teach me to play the guitar; Abhishek, a guy from Assam who had an amazing ability of talking about things that didn’t interest me; Dharmendra, who was tooooooo nice; Atul, who had a cute smile and a lovely UP accent and a couple of 'kakas', the species I love!


One person who needs a special mention here is a man in the academic section who had a nice South Indian accent but had an awesome ability of sounding rude! At times, I like people who are rude. I love being nice to them! After he went through my engineering mark sheets, he asked me ‘WHY’ I wanted to do social work. Even after a few dozen statements of mental clarity from my side-which is quite miraculous-he kept repeating that, “You will repent your decision! You will repent your decision!”
May his soul rest in peace!

It is impossible to term the return journey, 'happy 'as my phone had run out of charge and so I couldn't enjoy any music for 11 hours.I ran out of mumbai on the same day considering the killing heat there. But looking at my two-day freedom ending in just one day, I decided to celebrate it with some komdi. I got a lot of chicken-tandoori packed and had it with two bottles of coke at a dhaba! Wow! Life can sometimes offer you a lot in just 35 1/2 hours. . .

TISS trip Part 1

The start
Complying with my self set illustrious standards, I left for the private bus office late. Though it was fine according to the standards the buswalas have set and I reached there well in time, I got a good bashing on the phone from dad! When will my parents grow up to know this world??
In the one-minute walk from the office to the place where the bus was parked, I sang a song, whistled a tune and felt an unusual sense of happiness. I’m still trying to figure out the reason. It must have been a mixture of the two day long freedom from home and immobility that I was going to get, the excitement of formally confirming my admission into TISS and the fact that I’m single!

The baraat
I got the bus after 15 minutes and within another 10 minutes; it was in the outskirts of the city where there is a long row of marriage halls which are ‘pompously’ responsible for regularly creating a scene when people noisily attempt clearing the traffic up. As the bus crawled through that street, a strong smell of cheap perfume rushed into my nostrils from the dancing men and women and band members in the baraats!
The band played a hit tribal song that I have heard in three states-Maharashtra, Gujarat and Madhya Pradesh. It said, Amu kaka baba na porya re,gondaliyo kheladu, which means that we are all paternal brothers and sisters and we are going to play tribal games. This song had a music lesson for me. The simple you keep the tune and lyrics of the song, the popular it'll become! I peeped out of the window oscillating my head (almost banging it) in the vertical direction to join the crowd! A couple of men acknowledged the gesture!

The experiment
After half a dozen failed attempts to sleep, I finally reached Vashi in the morning at 5.45 am! I took a train to Gowandi and brushed my teeth at the station using the ‘drinking water’. I wanted to see if anyone shouted at me. No one did. Who cares about public property in our country, anyway? My faith in my people was reassured! They love mutual co-existence and personal freedom.

The roaming

I reached at the all-green campus in the morning at 6.30. I was fortunate that it was open and the watchmen were awake and co-operative! When asked that where I should resort for morning duties, I was told to check out the gents hostel. I met a guy with a Nepalese accent who tried to explain me how difficult it is to get into the hostel because of the stringent rules. Ten minutes later, the watchman allowed me to use the hostel for anything I wanted; making a mockery of the guy’s image building attempt! After taking a heavy breakfast at the dining hall, I was convinced that I won’t curse the mess staff here! There was so much healthy stuff to eat! After a two hour long wait, there were some humans visible in the campus.

pretty faces

i still wanna love pretty faces
atleast a few more
but don't wish to have feelings
permanent and sure


some of my tears are
for some other grief
i had enough of their pain
when i let them have all my cure!


i want to live for the 'me'
however lonely my heart may get
i'll get a crowd around this me
to make me things forget...


want to reclaim a few moments
want to look beyond my door
want to breathe some real air
want to make the best assured!


i'd been crawling a lot
my veins urge for a need to run
will find some other pursuit in life
than finding a lot of fun!


i don't have a plan to run away from love
don't think i'll run after it too
won't tell anyone here
all i need is you!

i still wanna love pretty faces
c'mon a few more
but won't have a feeling
permanent and sure...

kitty party

I generally have nothing to do these days...Citing this opportunity, my mother ordered me to organize a kitty party for her yesterday! Man, despite knowing that I am bad at practical handling of mechanical devices-irrelevant of the four years I learned to do that- I would have agreed for repairing my two-wheeler myself! But arranging a kitty party?? I hate myself for being nice to people all the time!
I had committed it. so I had to do it! They say that good managers focus on the larger issues, the key problems first. So, I tried to enlist them. In this case the main problem was to make ten aunties play some games peacefully! Woah! This meant that I will be a game designer as well. Pushpesh b, I outplayed you in this! So I designed a couple of them based on some blurred memories that I had of going into the parties with mom! The games had to be chosen taking into consideration all possible aunty ‘terms’ and at least half a dozen psychological ‘conditions’!
1. None of the aunties should feel insulted in case they don’t know any of the answers! Keep the questions moderate! (The first game was a GK quiz!)
2. No game should involve sharing of any prop. As the word written in bold letters isn’t in their dictionary!
3. The prize must be something that is useful in household chores and must be a cheap item so as to avoid envious looks within them!
4. There should be separate prizes for both the games. At least two of the aunties will go back blessing the organizers!

5. The games should be of short duration. The aunties should not start demanding for snacks half way!
6. The games should be such that the children accompanying their mothers shouldn’t be able to help them! (I had to choose the GK quiz in the end anyway!)
Phew!!! Lot of thinking, man!
Next was the choice of snacks. They had to be good, hot and in abundance! Mom extended all my estimations about the number of samosas and quantity of farsan needed to be served!
Actually if you take care of the second arrangement properly, aunties don’t care about the other things happening in the party!
Finally, everything was done with ease and my mother received some compliments. And I received a headache! To recover from the smiles that I had to fake for almost an hour, I listened to some Metallica!
When there was a tie between two aunties in the GK quiz, I gave both of them a mathematical question to solve! I was scared. What if none of them could do it?? But beacauseI kept it related to shopping and discounts, one of them got the answer correct and got the prize! All the aunties complained that they had lost touch with Math and other GK after they got married. Surprisingly, all of them could answer the mythology related questions I had kept because of mom’s recommendation. One of the aunties said, “Hamari line change ho gayi hai abhi! Ab yahi answers de payenge hum!” I laughed, but at the same time I felt sorry for them. Even I would be pissed off if I fail to answer a sports related question after some years in a party!
Well, my mother showered me with samosas and all the leftovers for a reward. I pray to the almighty that he keep away guys from year long unemployment and 'being-nice-all-the-time' syndromes!
By the way, at the end of the day (aha, some poetry!)
By the way, at the end of the day, it gave me a first hand experience of event management. The kitty party made up for all the event organizing opportunities that I missed or avoided in college!

God bless you, aunties! Muaah!!!

For Sowmya ma'am

People who know me say that it takes a cardiac arrest triggering news to wake me out of my sleep! I just don’t get moved by a place or thing or a person anymore! After all the analyses that my brain carries out, I zero down to a conclusion that nothing is impossible. And that people have a strong influence of their surroundings, friends, situations and education. And so I shouldn’t be impressed or feel inferior by unusual or brave acts. Despite all this trivial stuff that revolves my head, a few people cause a strong influence on my life and behavior. I never admit that I’m someone’s fan in front of the world like this. But today, I will definitely do that. This post is for one such person, Sowmya Nagarajan.
She is so special that I find all the words to describe her clichéd. She carries so much of gyaan and energy accompanied with her ‘exclusive exuberance’; I have almost forgotten that she was my English faculty at PT once! I know that there will be grammatical errors, a few dozen punctuation mistakes in this post and in all my posts, ma’am! But it’s not your fault! I never completed the grammar primer, or the language primer! I tried ‘my’ best though! :) God knows how I have made it to TISS!
Her best quality is her sense of humor. As far as I know the world, females can only ‘dream’ to be as humorous and whacky; men may give it a try! :) Mere college me aj tak koi aisi ladki kyun nahin ayi!!! She has raised the expectations I can have from a female!! Ma’am, you should actually ‘coach’ some girls under you, make them sowmya-like and then send them in different parts of the country to propagate sowmyaism! (In case you aren’t planning to get the art patented later:)) Bohot logo ka bhala ho jayega! Guys will worship your idols!
If someone wants to know how to stay happy, screw all the gurus! Go to sowmya nagarajan! Watch her, listen to her; she is better than all of them! There’s no wonder if some day I find her books becoming bestsellers!
I can keep on writing this as long as I wish to but I’m sure I am going to write some more of these for you, ma’am! Thank you for all the wisdom and help and motivation and what not; may you get your Francisco D'Anconia! I don’t know who he is, nahin to main baat karva deta:)!